Speeding A speeding motorist was waved down by a police patrol car. “I'm going to give you a ticket for speeding,” said the policeman, writing his note. “You've been driving over 60 miles per hour.” “Would you mind making it 100, officer?” was the reply. “You see, I'm going to sell the car.。
The dog and the fox Some dogs found the skin of a lion and began to tear it to piece with their teeth.A fox seeing them,said:"If this lion were alive,you would soon find out that his claws were stronger than you teeth!" It is easy to kick a man that is down. 够短吗? 很简单了```````。
The Old Cat
An old woman had a cat. The cat was very old; she could not run quickly, and she could not bite, because she was so old. One day the old cat saw a mouse; she jumped and caught the mouse. But she could not bite it; so the mouse got out of her mouth and ran away, because the cat could not bite it.
Then the old woman became very angry because the cat had not killed the mouse. She began to hit the cat. The cat said, "Do not hit your old servant. I have worked for you for many years, and I would work for you still, but I am too old. Do not be unkind to the old, but remember what good work the old did when they were young."
【译文】
老猫
一位老妇有只猫,这只猫很老,它跑不快了,也咬不了东西,因为它年纪太大了。一天,老猫发现一只老鼠,它跳过去抓这只老鼠,然而,它咬不住这只老鼠。因此,老鼠从它的嘴边溜掉了,因为老猫咬不了它。
于是,老妇很生气,因为老猫没有把老鼠咬死。她开始打这只猫,猫说:“不要打你的老仆人,我已经为你服务了很多年,而且还愿意为你效劳,但是,我实在太老了,对年纪大的不要这么无情,要记住老年人在年青时所做过的有益的事情。”
The Thirsty Pigeon口渴的鸽子
A PIGEON, oppressed by excessive thirst, saw a goblet of water painted on a signboard. Not supposing it to be only a picture, she flew towards it with a loud whir and unwittingly dashed against the signboard, jarring herself terribly. Having broken her wings by the blow, she fell to the ground, and was caught by one of the bystanders.
Zeal should not outrun discretion.
有只鸽子口渴得很难受,看见画板上画着一个水瓶,以为是真的。他立刻呼呼地猛飞过 去,不料一头碰撞在画板上,折断了翅膀,摔在地上,被人轻易地捉住了。
这是说,有些人想急于得到所需的东西,一时冲动,草率从事,就会身遭不幸。
ne day, he was having a meal in a small country hotel and wanted to order some eggs. But he couldn't remember the word for eggs.
Suddenly, through the window, he saw a rooster walking in the yard. He immediately asked the waiter what the bird was called in English. The waiter told him that it was called a rooster.
The Frenchman then asked what the rooster's wife was called. The waiter told him that she was called a hen.
The Frenchman then asked what the hen's children were called. The waiter told him that they were chickens.
The Frenchman then asked what the chickens were called before they were born.
The waiter told him they were called eggs.
"Fine!" said the Frenchman. "Please bring me two eggs and a cup of coffee.
once there was a boy who lived on a farm. Every day he had to take his father's sheep to a hill. One day he tried to play a trick on the other people. He said to himself. I will call “wolf. wolf.” then everyone come to help me. It will be fun when they find out there is no wolf after all. So he cried: “wolf .wolf.” and everyone ran to help him. When they came he just said: “there is no wolf. It was only a joke.” He did this three times. Then one day a wolf really came. “Help! Help! The wolf is here.” called the boy. But everyone said: “No you know that there is no wolf. He is just calling us for fun. There is no danger.” So they did not go to help the boy. The wolf killed all the sheep then.
狼来了
从前,有一个住在农场里的孩子。每天,他都要带他父亲的羊到山上去放。
一天,他想对其他人开一次玩笑。他自言自语说道:“我要叫“狼呀!狼呀!”那么,人人都会来帮我的了。如果,他们发现根本没有狼,那么多有趣呀!”
因此他叫道:“狼呀!狼呀!”每个人都跑去帮助他。
当他们来到的时候,他只是说:“这里没有狼,这只是一个玩笑。”
他这样做了三次。
然后,有一天,一只狼真的来了。
“救命!救命!狼来了!”男孩子叫道.
但人人都说:“我们知道那儿没有狼。他只不过是因为好玩而叫我们。那里没有危险的。”
于是,他们没有去帮助那个男孩子。狼便把所有的羊都咬死了。
One day, there was a blind man sitting on the steps of a building with a sign by his feet, that read: "I am blind, please help。
" A creative publicist was walking by the blind man and stopped to observe that the man only had a few coins in his hat。 He put a few of his own coins in the hat, and without stopping to ask for permission, took the sign, turned it around, and wrote a new message。
He then placed the sign by the feet of the blind man, and left。 Later that afternoon the creative publicist returned by the blind man and noticed that his hat was almost completely full of bills and coins。
The blind man recognized his footsteps and asked if it was him who had changed his sign? He also wanted to know what the man wrote on it? The pulicist said:"All I did is to make your words clearer。 " The he prayed the blind man, saying "Goodby!" and went on his journey。
The blind man didn't know that his new sign read like this: Now it's spring but I can't see it。 一天,有个瞎子坐在一栋大楼的台阶上,脚下的标牌上写着:“我是个瞎子,请帮帮我。”
一位有创意的广告员从瞎子身旁经过时停了下来,看到瞎子的帽子里只有一些硬币。他也在帽子里放了几个硬币,未经允许,就拿过标牌,翻过来在上面重新写了一句标语,然后把标牌放回瞎子的脚下,离开了。
那天下午晚些时候,这位广告员回到了这个身旁,他发现帽子里几乎装满了纸钞和硬币。瞎子听出了他的脚步声,问他是否是那个改标牌的人?他也想知道这位男士在上面写了什么。
广告员回答说:“我只是改了你的标语使人们能够看明白。”他向这个瞎子表达了祝福,说了再见,继续走自己的路。
瞎子并不知道,他的新标语是这样的: 现在是春天,但我却看不到。 。
God's Coffee
A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor. Conversation
soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.
Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen
and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups - porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking,
some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the coffee.
When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said: "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up,
leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your
problems and stress.
Be assured that the cup itself adds no quality to the coffee. In
most cases it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink.
What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you
consciously went for the best cups。 And then you began eyeing
each other's cups. Now consider this: Life is the coffee; the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, and the type of cup we have does not define,
nor change the quality of Life we live.
Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee God has provided us."
God brews the coffee, not the cups。。。. Enjoy your coffee!
"The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just
make the best of everything."
Live simply.
Love generously.
Care deeply.
Speak kindly.
Leave the rest to God.